I just saw Beth for the first time last night. She contacted me and said she really wanted to experience a session with a Dominatrix, and had thought about for a long time, but felt very apprehensive about it — so apprehensive that she felt she couldn’t even talk about it out loud.
While we were negotiating the scene, which was clearly challenging for her, she expressed some deeper issues, such as embarrassment, shame, and that she “spent a lifetime repressing feelings or thoughts that seemed ‘wrong'”.
She disclosed that she struggles with depression and a lot of anxiety. She explained that she’s let fear “rule” her her entire life and make decisions for her, and this has filled her with many regrets. Some of her fear was about physical contact and intimacy, and that she’s has created walls to protect herself, which simultaneously has created her own isolation from happiness and fulfillment.
But she said she is tired of it. She’s tired of being a “prisoner of her own brain”; she really wants to break through that. And she told me she thought I would be a good match for her because of my background and skills in psychology, and the testimonials that people had written about their experiences with me.
I suggested a coaching session before we met to discuss some of these deeper feelings and hopefully help to assuage her anxiety. She accepted and it allowed me to get to know her even more, which allowed me to tweak the session to benefit her even more.
I wanted it to be therapeutic, but also sexy. Well, here’s what she emailed me afterward:
“I just got home, exhausted, a bit delirious and with a behind that is still stinging….I smiled the whole way home. I truly do not know how to thank you for tonight. It was the most incredible thing I have ever experienced, and although I am still a bit overwhelmed and my head is spinning as I try to process this, I am so profoundly grateful to you. You really must have super powers, because you managed to intimidate me, get in my head and push, while somehow managing to make me feel comfortable with you, and safe. Trust does not come easily to me, and although I don’t know why, I do trust you. I left your house feeling so proud of myself ( a rarity!) And by the time I got home, I was actually feeling hopeful, for the first time in a very long time, that I might be able to break thru these limits this time. Hope is everything, and I have no idea how to thank you for that.
I hope I have your permission to request another session with you down the road, because i really believe I have more work to do. And, just typing this is making me bright red, but it was actually fun!
Thank you so much Mistress, for everything.”
10 thoughts on “My Time With Beth”
I am glad Beth finally worked up the courage, and I am glad that it was a positive and fulfilling experience. It also gives me hope (as someone with very similar apprehensions) that maybe one day I can be in the same shoes. There have been at least a few times when I have partly filled up either the session form or the coaching form (unable to decide which was more appropriate) and then backed out.
You must not be ready. When you are, you will stop backing out.
It is so worth the risk. And why choose between the forms? Start with a coaching session, to feel comfortable with Mistress and explain your fears and apprehensions. If you speak open and honestly with her, no matter how difficult it is, I guarantee you will end the call feeling ready to have the wonderful experience you have been denying yourself. Wishing you strength and courage to take that leap.
Thank you Mistress Tissa for posting this.
After reading this blog post, my mind is working on processing how a Mistress / Dominant can be intimidating and kind at the same time. With intimidation comes fear, and with kindness comes comfort. How do the two go together?
That is absolutely beautiful. In my mind, this is classic Mistress Tissa. This is Your secret sauce, that is so hard to describe, and impossible to replicate. Your unique blend of kindness, empathy, sadism, understanding, deviousness, caring, allure…I’m happy for every person who gets to experience You.
…and jealous. LOL!
How kind of you to say, Luke! Looking forward to wherever our next adventure takes us!
Hurrah for beth!! What a great story and a new beginning for beth as she learns to face fears.Things are rarely as bad as what one thinks about fear.To the guys on the sidelines that are afraid.Mistress does not bite,she will carefully construct a session within your limits.Your first session could be with training wheels if you like,so get on and ride like the big boys.
Congrats Beth on a great session and positive step forward! Facing fears as well as admitting and living out some fantasies is awesome. Glad you had fun and hope there’s more kinky fun for you in the near future.